Saturday 30 November 2013

Getting started...

I've made a plan. I spent the whole day crying yesterday and facing the facts of my new situation. I went to get a glocometer and pills to help me control my glucose level today. I will beat this, get off of medications and be in the best shape I've ever been.

My goal weight is 150lbs. I want to reach that by next December. I think it's a realistic goal! I will be working out 3-4 times a week if not more, and have a strict diet. For my diet, I am going to get the help from Dr Bernsteins. I've heard a lot of mixed comments regarding the diet, some have even called it a starvation diet, but I've seen the meal plan, went for an orientation and this is it, I'm doing it. They've informed me that within 20-23 weeks I can be at my goal weight. I think I am going to use them to get a kick start to my journey and then stick to gym and healthy diet.

I've completed all my research about different exercises and workout options. I'm contemplating between yoga or training. But I think I'll be doing a bit of both. It's just really expensive getting healthy. Gym costs about 45$/month, healthy eating - I spent 79$ for 2 weeks, dr b cost me 650$/5weeks not included the bars, shakes and cookies I bought and yoga will be about 100-220$/month depending on what option I take. This may be a little overwhelming but I want results. I refuse to eat pills and check my blood sugar level all the time. I just can't live that way!

Today is Saturday. Normally I would wait until Monday to start something, but now I am starting today. There have been too many Mondays that I started and then quitter, but this time it's different and I know it. I feel positive and motivated and in a better state of mind. I know what I want and I will achieve it. There are better things waiting for me once I get clos to my goal weight, so I just need to work hard and get it done!

Tuesday 26 November 2013

Background Information

Just make it happen
This is the motto of my new lifestyle changing journey.

Lets start with the background information of how I got here.

You know those people who always say that they have always been big, even when they were kids? Well, that's me. I've always been slightly overweight, I was an active child playing sports: street hockey, soccer, swimming, basketball, and so on. I played sports in high school but always on the heavy side. I think in high school my average weight was 170-200lbs. You would think that's a lot. Believe me, I did too, but I can carry my weight well and looked more like a 170 when I was actually 200.

For the past couple of years I've been trying to loose weight and get fit. I've always wanted to do this for me. To be healthy, wear nice close, no layers in the summer and just be the best me that I can be. Everything starts on a Monday. I get up and say today is the day. I make it to lunch till I face the world and cave in to something sugary and sweet that I absolutely want at that time.

I've always lived without consequences. Do what I want. Eat what I want. Never worry about anything else because you only live once right? Why deprive myself from a chocolate bar I want now or a cupcake or a burger. What if I never get to eat this again. Should I take the risk of not enjoying this sugary treat? What if tomorrow never comes and I miss my chance of eating this delicious treat?

Now, at the age of 25, I am starting to understand what you only live once really means. You only have on body, if you don't take care of it, you may not even live this one life. My heaviest, I've weighed 255lbs. I've managed to loose 30lbs by cutting out soda, burgers and pizza. I absolutely love pizza but I need to do this. If not now then when? Will I still have my life to live or will I be popping pills to control my blood sugar and not get a chance to live my life to the fullest.

You might think that I'm lazy. That's why I've never lost the weight. You are right, but I've been lazy for too long. Ad things are changing. I am not starting a diet or workout plan for a couple of weeks.  No this is a lifelong goal that I wish to achieve. I've been told that if you want to loose weight the healthiest way is to loose about 1lbs/week; 1-2lbs/week with the right nutrition and gym plan, anything more is not healthy and will be harder to maintain. You are probably thinking that with my past struggles I would opt for the first option lbs/week. Unfortunately I'm in a situation that I need help.

You see today, I finally got the results of my blood work. I can't remember the last time I did a blood test. Maybe in 2009-2010? Diabetes runs in my family, but you always think that oh no worries, I won't get it. But then one day you go in for a regular visit, they welcome you, bring you to a room sit you down and give you facts and figures about what your blood sugar level should be at, your cholesterol level should be at and start using other terms that are in your blood that you may or may not understand. At that point you may already be lost, hearing about all these long words that are in your blood and the they continue speaking but all you hear is, "you have diabetes".

I don't remember what else was said. How I reacted. I just took the papers walked out like a zombie and just crashed when I got home. How can I have diabetes? I know I've eaten unhealthy for a while but diabetes?! I cried for a moment thinking about all the chances I've had to make it work, continue going to the gym, not give up, continue eating right and so on. Why am I a quitter? I wouldn't be here if I continued eating healthy, not gain the weight, not eat all that junk. I got myself here.

After feeling guilty for what seems like days, I decided to stop thinking about the past and think about whats next. myself here and I will change my situation. I'm going to change my life and get through this. Eat healthy and clean, workout 2-3 times a week and change my lifestyle.

I've always dreamt about being healthy and fit and I will get there. I won't get there tomorrow, it took years for me to get here and it will take time to get it all off, but I'm willing to wait and get it done. Because not only do I want to. But I need to now. It's now or never. And I'm 25 currently weighing in at 225lbs and I want to live a long healthy life.